Don't Cry Alicia!

 There is a social media influencer from Halifax, Nova Scotia, named Alicia McCarvell, who promotes body positivity, showcases her great sense of humor, and shares her adventures with her hubby. If you've come across her, you know how funny some of the videos are, and many of you have because she's got 6.2 MILLION followers on TikTok and 2 million on Instagram. What a success story!

  Every day, at least one of her videos crosses my screen, and usually I take a peek.  Her body-positivity posts inspire many. She is smart, talented, and yes, curvy. I've seen her give fashion shows, display what she bought at Costco, and go on vacation. She's got quirky glasses and laughs at her CPAP machine prettiness. Her husband Scott is in a lot of her videos, and he is one handsome dude who is obviously deliriously in love with his wife. 

  Alicia shares her life with all of us, and for the most part, we enjoy it, thank her, and appreciate the happiness she brings into our lives. But as we all know, sharing anything on social media comes at a price... keyboard critics who unleash their nastiness with the most vile, spiteful language. They feel they can insult, belittle, and criticize no matter the topic. Saying things they would never say to her face from the safety of their basements.

  But today I saw a video she posted, and it made me furious! She's crying. Yes, some loser, actually losers plural, made this woman cry. Someone they don't know. Someone whose videos they don't have to watch. Someone just trying to share their life with like-minded people. They made her cry. All because of the horrific, disgusting comments they have left on her posts. I said losers, but I really mean assholes.

  Alicia asked the question we all ask when someone we don't know comments on a Facebook post or a TikTok video we've posted: What did I ever do to you? The simple answer is nothing. You did absolutely nothing. These horrible people feel better about themselves by trying to make others feel bad. They really believe that people reading their comments think they are smarter than anyone else. They are jealous whether they can admit it or not. 

  We all read the comments. And 99 good reviews are overshadowed by the 1 nasty one. That's a sad fact, but a fact nonetheless. Nothing I say or do will change that. But here is something I do know: at the end of the day, we need to pity those who say these vile things. Their unhappiness, their bitterness about their lives, drives them to try to make the rest of us just as miserable. Misery loves company, or so they say.

  Don't stop sharing your life and your accomplishments. Keep making your followers smile, laugh, and celebrate with you. Don't let those assholes win. 

  And from one NS girl to another...keep hitting that block button!!

  Ang

  

Fly Away Little Birds

  As parents, we are always walking a fine line, trying to figure out when it's "time". Whether it's getting rid of the bottle or soother, social media accounts, or dating, we all struggle. Especially when it comes time for our babies to leave the nest. But when our "kids" reach a certain age, we all need to let go and let them claim both successes and mistakes as their own. Some of us are excited about it, and others can't seem to let go. 

  All around me, I see parents who never let go, and their adult children pay a huge price for it. Mom and Dad want nice apartments in nice neighborhoods for their offspring. Even when they themselves lived in a crappy one in a seedy area of town! Complaining that rent is too high, though we scraped up $500 a month when we were barely making $700 in "our day". So it was good enough for us, but not our kids? Interesting. Don't we all think we did a better job raising our kids than our parents did with us? If we truly believe that, then what's the problem?

  What many parents forget is exactly what we learned in those first few years of struggle. How to cook and stretch a food budget comes to mind immediately. We figured out Kraft Dinner didn't actually need butter and milk to be eaten, and that peanut butter could get us through an entire shift at work. Where we used to laugh at commuters on the bus, we sat happily beside them, thankful to be out of the rain or snow. And while our furniture was mostly hand-me-downs, we became thankful for a place to sit and a table to eat at. 

  I would say the biggest lesson we learned from our dive on Gaston Road was how much better we wanted our home life to be. We wanted nice furniture and a larger TV. We quickly understood that buying a good mattress might be the most important piece of furniture we could own, and we wanted it covered with a pretty duvet and soft pillows. And that a yard was a luxury we wanted! Armed with all this new information about ourselves, we worked harder, spent less on late-night pizza and beer, and brought our lunch to work. We grew up and began to realize what was important to us. A life lesson I'm not sure you can get in any other way. 

  Now we are on the precipice of sending our children into the world of bills and responsibility. They will learn to live with the consequences of their decisions. They will be the ones looking at their bank account balance of $17.22 and figuring out how to stretch that til payday. They'll need to learn how to change a furnace filter or fix a broken door lock. But you know what? They will. Cause we all did! It's part of growing up.

  I'm looking forward to the next phase of both my children's lives and the parenting journey that is changing yet again. It will be filled with happiness and excitement I'm sure. And you'll hear my voice cheering them on the loudest and proudest, no matter what they do. I'm their Mom after all!!

  Let the adventures begin!

  Ang