Thursday 5 April 2018

Send In The Troops


  As the wife of a retired air force member, my outlook on the use of troops is different than most. That's why when I hear about Canada sending troops anywhere I get a little apprehensive. The average Canadian has no idea what those actions mean...for everyone involved. I want to tell you some of what it's like from a different view.

  Most adults have a will. You probably made one when you had children or started an RRSP. Chances are it has never been changed, looked at, or thought about since then. Military families see it, discuss it and in some cases, change it, every deployment. No one wants to talk about this subject once let alone every few years. But troops need to be prepared and that means making sure their affairs are in order.  Just in case.

  How do you explain to your kids that Mom or Dad will be gone for a long time. They can understand that other children need our help to be safe and what a wonderful thing it is that we are able to do that. But they don't care about that when Dad doesn't tuck them in at night or Mom can only Skype them once a week. No explanation can make a parent missing a first goal or an A okay. They are kids and are supposed to be selfish. 

  The remaining spouse takes on every job. And there are lots of them. Banker, maintenance worker, car mechanic, groundskeeper. The list is long. If the roof leaks that's your responsibility. The house alarm goes off at noon while you are at work, again that's you. Two feet of snow needs to be shoveled? Garbage put out. Rent cheque bounces. You, you and you. While you might get some help from family and friends, you never want to bother them unless it's an absolute emergency.

  You, the family, are scared. Your daily life is the same but you have no idea what life is like for them. Are bombs going off around them? Are they going on patrols where land mines have been planted? Is someone going to come too close to the ship and throw a bomb at the hull? Is a rocket launcher going to take down a plane? All thoughts go through your head. Whether you know they are feasible or not. It's human nature.

  Lack of sleep, added stress and relationship issues are all too common. Living alone can be hard for many people and when you are single parenting that is made even worse. No matter how strong a marriage or relationship is, six months or a year is a very long time to be apart. If there were cracks before deployment they could become sinkholes by the time they return. Sad but true.

  The next time you hear about Canada, or any government, deploying troops understand what this means for those folks and their families. It affects more people, in more ways, than you can imagine. 

  On a response note....if you have any intention of saying "they knew what they were signing up for" or "it's part of the job" or any of the cliches I have heard over the years....save it. I do not want to hear it. These brave women and men see and do things that no human beings should ever see or do. You trivializing it means you really don't deserve it or understand it.

  Ang
  

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