I'm Positive

  I haven't written anything for quite a while. Mostly because everything I wanted to talk about was depressing, sad or angry. It was about injustice, the sanity of Trump or the intolerance of Baird and Kenney. And I was tired of all of it. With the never-ending news cycle, I found myself fixating on the bad and ignoring the good. But not today.

  Sometimes it's difficult to see the flowers through the weeds. That doesn't mean they aren't there....just harder to find. It takes more focus and clearer vision. When you watch the news there is a sense of doom that is hard to shake no matter how pretty the flowers.

  But today the pool is blue and the sun is shining. We are healthy, happy and safe. There is a roof over our heads and food in the fridge. Our bills are paid and our car will get us from point A to B safely. What more could we ask for?

  From now on I promise to write about good things more so than bad. To temper the flow of negativity with bits and pieces of happiness taken from wherever I can. If I can't find any of my own then I will share my friends' happiness. The world has much more happiness than sadness in it. We need to always remember that.

  It's time to start looking for it at every corner....starting with a huge congratulations to my wonderful friend Vince on his engagement!!!

  Ang

     

An Early News Break

  I've spent every day since coming home from Nova Scotia working. On the gardens, the weeds, the laundry, the basement, the pool etcetera etcetera etcetera. I'm now exhausted and ready for a vacation. A real one where we lie on a beach for a week and someone brings me a margarita every 30 minutes.

  So while I may neglected my writing, I have been listening to the news and reading and I have a few thoughts on current events. Here goes....

  Dear PM Trudeau, Let's use this "crisis" with Saudi Arabia as an opportunity to stop buying oil from them. Why don't we refine our own and sell it to ourselves? That way we can take care of our own and even sell a little to others. Would that really be a bad thing? Saudi Arabia takes in no refugees, doesn't help out much in U.N. missions and has awful human rights violations. It's time to move onwards and upwards.

  Richard Gere is going to become a father again at 68. And people are celebrating. But Janet Jackson or Brigitte Nielson were vilified for being too old. This double standard is garbage. If you want to talk health risks that's one conversation but this idea that the women are being selfish because they won't be around as their kids grow up but it doesn't apply to older men is infuriating. 

  LeBron James opened a school for at-risk 3rd and 4th graders. Wow this little school has everything. A food pantry for families, tuition for college, books, meals and it's free. Free! And Trump called him dumb. I'll take the "dumb" guy every time thanks. 

  Speaking of Trump, he threw his kid under the bus. Forget what Jr. did for a moment. His Dad sacrificed him to save himself. That's either extreme tough love or narcissism at its purist. No matter it cannot help but foster a strained father/son relationship. A presidential pardon doesn't give you your reputation back. Oh wait his rep was pretty sketchy to begin with.

  And in probably the best news this past week, Sir Patrick Stewart is returning to the small screen as, wait for it, Captain Jean Luc Picard! This makes me ridiculously happy. He was always my favorite of all the series. Fingers crossed this show is on Canadian tv.

  Those are a few thoughts to start the day. Now where is that laundry basket?

  Ang

  
  


  

  

Embrace The Chaos

  I'm a little frustrated right now and it is a feeling most parents share. I cannot for the life of me get ahead on cleaning this house. Not one inch. Try as I might two kids are outwitting me at every turn.

  First thing this morning I recleaned the bathroom. Just two days ago I put everything back in the drawers and picked the clothes and towels up. This morning I see more clothes, whiskers, kleenexes, unused q-tips, toothbrushes, razors and who knows what else on the countertop. With a sigh, I clean the sink, counter and toilet...again. As I walk downstairs to get the mop I see the living room, which I cleaned yesterday, in disarray.

  Not just untidy but with a new glass ring on the sofa table. I guess it matches the new grease stains on the sofa from last week. There is a pop can hiding behind the curtain and as I bend to pick it up I also see wrappers from something under the chair. How did all of this get here in under 24 hours??? No one was in that room all day!

  With a louder, longer sigh, I walk into the kitchen to get some cleaner for the bathroom floor. The adjoining family room, which is constantly being cleaned, has an inflatable pool toy in the middle of the floor and a blanket is lying beside it. The Wii is on the side table, hiding the fish which haven't been fed yet, and the box of accessories on the floor scattered beneath it. 

  In the kitchen, which honestly I gave up on a long time ago, the island is buried. The countertop has both clean and dirty dishes on it and a tube of toothpaste. The coffee maker is accessible and clean. That's something I suppose. Maybe I should just have another cup and calm down.

  As I pick a shirt up off the bar stool and open the basement door, I realize that there are at least five loads of laundry waiting for me downstairs. One long drawn out sigh escapes my lips as I turn defeated back to the kitchen. How did this become our reality? When did keeping 1800 square feet clean become a full-time job? Fifteen years ago when we had our first child is when. 

  Forget the mess. Enjoy your kids. Soon they will move to their own homes and yours will be clean again. Quiet.....but clean. 

  Embrace the chaos. Perspective has hit me yet again.

  Ang

  

Money Money Money

  One of the greatest things about having my own blog is the ability to talk about whatever has happened in my life or in the world around me. But I've noticed lately, and John pointed it out to me yesterday, that that isn't always the case. I find more and more I am deleting posts before publishing because friends or family might take issue with them. 

  Recently I had two conversations about money and credit card debt. Both were disturbing to me and when I wrote about the issue of "bad debt" and how we judge people on it John commented on how it might be viewed as controversial. To who? The people I had the conversation with? The words were spoken and if they meant what they said and weren't offended by my responses then why would they be now? So here goes....

  Most folks I know carry a balance on at least one credit card or line of credit. Life throws us curve balls unexpectedly and we deal with the financial ones the best we can. Sometimes that is thanks to Visa. Does that make them bad people? Or irresponsible? No, it makes them human. But judging them harshly because of it is bad and irresponsible.

  If you are lucky to have a high paying job or a paid for house count your blessings. Chances are you have disposable income for that emergency bank account. You can save for a new roof or car and afford sports and piano lessons for your kids. Much needed vacations can be paid in cash and eating out a regular thing without guilt.

  But I know more of the have-nots than the haves. Those whose incomes are average and who make their mortgage payments on a bi-weekly basis. They try to save for things like the other half does but financial emergencies come up all the time. When it's a major car repair or water in the basement out comes the Mastercard to save the day. Not to mention the Christmas gifts and Subway runs. Such is life for many, many Canadians.

  Debt is bad. We all know that. In fact, people who are in debt know that better than those who aren't. But we still help out family members in need. Give to charities and help out the food bank. We put our kids in hockey and hire tutors to help them. We order pizza and Chinese when we are too lazy to cook. Braces and glasses cannot wait til our cash flow increases.

  How much money we owe means nothing really. Just as it doesn't matter how much we have in the bank. Don't judge me, or anyone, because our financial habits aren't the same. As long as I'm not asking to borrow money from you just mind your business. 

  Besides like Mr. Hart and Mr. Kauffman said you can't take it with you!

  Ang

     

Home Sweet Home

  I'm home. Those words bring me as much joy as the words "we are on vacation". Obviously for different reasons. As I sit at my dining room table, in my pajamas, drinking a second cup of coffee, happy in the fact that I'm not driving anywhere today, I'm happy and contented exactly where I am.

  We spent two weeks visiting family and friends on the east coast. While we didn't see everyone, not even close, we managed to get in a few people we haven't been able to see in years. Sometimes the get together was short and sweet....think Catherine, Hugh & Heather. Others daily for a week...think Vada, Henley & Lincoln.

  My aunt Mary was a quick chat in the grocery. Next year you are a sit-down visit I promise. Sharon & Charlie were a beer and lobster delivery. Mary Lou & Paul, Cindi, Joanne, JohnD & Myretta, Greg & Nicole, Gail & Danny, Marie & Paul....an evening and brunch together for most of you. Both enjoyed immensely I should add. 

  Those of you we didn't see please remember....we wanted to see you all, however, the reality of life is time is short. And time goes faster when you are on vacation than normal time. But next year you will make the short list. We promise.

  We were able to visit twice our nephew who was in a horrific car accident 10 weeks ago. He is making progress albeit slowly. But every day is a miracle and we as a family are so happy that he is still with us. Matt keep fighting. There is light at the end of your journey that promises no more pain and back to your old self. Just with a bit more titanium!

  Now if someone would just come and do our vacation laundry.....

  Ang

Happy Anniversary

  I know I know it's been a while. We are on our way back home from two weeks ocean side. While the drive doesn't seem that long, only 1600 kms, two kids arguing over nothing makes it feel like much longer. Much much longer.

  But I'll bore you with all those details in the days to come. I wanted to take a quick few minutes before getting some sleep because tomorrow is our wedding anniversary! Yup driving on "our" day. That is the ultimate in romance.

  The first five years of our marriage John was gone more than home. We spent very little time together. While he was off saving the world, sometimes quite literally, I continued thinking someday we would have all the time in the world. 

  Years 6-14 were more of the same. Less travel but for longer periods of time. Still, we were by far the happiest couple we knew. Then the terror attack in New York City happened and everything changed for us. Less than six weeks later off he went to the Middle East for another seven months. That's where our story really changed.

  Looking back, the last fifteen have been by far the best. Two kids and retirement have changed the very fabric of our lives. We haven't moved in nine years....a record for us. Life is better than ever.

  Happy anniversary John! I can't imagine sharing my life with anyone else. You are the best husband I could ever ask for. Not to mention "buff"... a private joke that I am not going to explain.

  Ang

Canada's Ocean Playground

  One of the many benefits of vacation is breathing. Simple breaths that quiet the mind and refuel the soul. No gulps to sap your energy. That is what we needed and that is what we are getting.

  Greetings from "Canada's Ocean Playground" the beautiful province of Nova Scotia. Right now we are in a small coastal town where people leave their windows open at night to sleep and their car doors unlocked in their driveways. You can buy fresh wild blueberries on the side of the road and fish from the back of a truck that is better than anything you have ever tasted. And a traffic jam means the Canso Causeway was open to let a boat through.

  I went to get coffee this morning and they had run out of drink trays. I was ready, willing and able to make two trips but no the person behind the counter came out and helped me carry them out to the car! Imagine that happening in my million person city...nope I can't even.

  We've had lobster already. Of course. I'm not sure how much I ate but it was a lot. And there are leftovers so today we can enjoy more. If you get the opportunity to visit here you need to find a wharf and wait for the fishing boats to come in. The view is spectacular and you might just get lucky and find some for sale...cheap.

  The cool ocean breezes keep the mosquitos at bay but not the horse or moose flies. Yes, they are as big as their names suggest. Watching the sailboats and occasional sea-doos is the perfect way to pass an afternoon. For me it's therapeutic. 

  It's time for me to stop writing and start vacationing again. The Atlantic Ocean awaits. Can you smell the salt air?

  Ang