Back Where I Belong!

   I'm back!! I tried my own website but between the setup and maintenance, I thought I was missing the point. I spent so much time fixing pictures and redoing layouts that I lost the joy of writing. It was becoming...work! And that was not the point of this blog. If it wasn't fun and/or therapeutic then what was the point? This format works well for me and with these new fonts, which I know some of you will hate, and will tell me so in the comments section, I'm ready to go. Let's begin...

  Vaccines are now being administered in Canada!!! COVID 19 vaccines are already in the arms of some healthcare workers across the country. This makes me ridiculously happy. For 274 days my family has been going about our business with masks, Lysol, and six feet between us and our friends. We couldn't see our family as we couldn't even get to other provinces. All of which we understood because this was an unprecedented pandemic. Now that we can see a light at the end of the tunnel we are ecstatic that we will be able to see our family & friends again soon.

  See even though we couldn't go to the movies or out to dinner that's not what we missed. It was the company of our friends and family that we missed. I want to hug Gosia and laugh over foolish things. Sit on Janet's cottage deck and relax as you only can with people you've known forever. I need to hug baby Nora and call Heather Grandma while we fight over who's going to hold her. 

  Mostly I want to be able to tell my kids they can go see their grandparents this summer. That they can talk to Grandma about school and tease Grandad about his hair. I want to see my Mom and brothers & sisters. We want to drive "down the shore" and see Aunt Charlotte and stop to see if Charlie has any spare lobster. I'm waiting to play cards with Berkie for a toonie which he always wins...cause I let him. The things that we truly missed if we are honest. Let that be the lesson we learn from this shit-show of a year.

  However...as per usual some of you who were complaining for months about not being able to see anyone, and telling anyone who would listen that the government was doing a bad job are now bitching about the vaccine and who gets it when. Let me give you some unsolicited advice. STOP IT. NOW! We all know it will take time for this miracle drug to bring us back to some level of normalcy. Trust me we do. But some of us need that hope to keep our kids and elderly parents in a good place. You repeatedly reminding us otherwise helps no one. Once I see or hear the word "but" I could strangle some of you.

  We will get thru this last stage of the pandemic. Most of us will get the vaccine and make it safe for all of us to spend time with those we love. It will happen and soon. I promise.

  Ang

  

I've Moved

 Good morning everyone! Hope you are all healthy and happy on this August day. Ugh, it's too early for that much sugar. 

  A few weeks ago I decided to finally get my website up and running. It's always been the goal but I never seemed to get to it. Now I have and I love it! It's a work in progress and needs some tweaking but so far so good.

  Now it's time for you to make the switch. I will slowly be moving all the posts from here to the website and all new entries will only be there. It will be easier to have everything in one place.

  You can subscribe so you don't miss any new "rants" and still leave comments. Not much has changed except where your browser sends you. 

  Hope to see you at www.thekernicklife.ca soon!

  Ang

What About The Kids?

  If you have children chances are you are as worried about what September will look like for schooling as I am. It's a short 7 weeks til the 2020/21 school year begins and we are still floating in the wind waiting for details. There is a fluid plan that in my oh so humble opinion will be a disaster but the fact that there is some sort of plan is encouraging. For a while there it wasn't looking too promising. 

  Hubby and I had pretty much decided not to send the boys back in the fall if a vaccine was not available. That seems to be a given now. But our decision has changed and we are now in a "wait and see" frame of mind. What changed our minds you ask well it's simple...we stopped, took a breath, and looked at the big picture. 

  Every day I listen to folks talk about stopping the spread. And I 100% agree. We need to keep ourselves, our children, and others safe from this virus. But our overall health includes our mental health and that is where a huge difference comes into play between adults and kids. 

  Adults can express their anxiety and fears in ways that teenagers do not have the skills to. If we have issues can you imagine theirs? Add hormones, school, peer pressure, social media, did I mention hormones, into the mix and you have a perfect storm brewing. One that some kids cannot steer out of. That is something we need to take into account and watch out for. And it's just as important as their physical well being. During this pandemic maybe even more.

  Even now in 2020, we talk about mental health in whispers. People feel pity for the breakdowns of Brittany Spears and Dave Chappelle. Others like Catherine Zeta-Jones are heralded as brave for talking about her bipolar disease. Would she be "brave" if she talked about her diabetes? Or her Crohns? No, and that's the problem. One that if we do not get past will end up perpetuating the stigma of mental health diseases forever.

  Back to the kids...we must look at the big picture. Will they be wearing masks? Will there still be an average of 28 kids in the class? What about lunch? What about the bathrooms? How do we get them there? All good questions and all need to be answered. Then parents need to ask "How will my child cope with being isolated again?" That last one needs to be answered honestly. Even if we don't like the answer. 

  Know your kid. Understand their weaknesses and their strengths. Maybe going into the classroom is worth the risk. Only you as a parent can decide. Just don't judge others who come to a different decision. 

  I'll let you know what we decide...much, much closer to September!

  Ang

Are We Too Paranoid?

  I'm sitting here during day 98 of my family's hibernation within these four walls wondering when this will end. Things are slowly returning to the status quo. Shops, daycares, and restaurants are inching towards normalcy. There is a "plan" for back to school in September...okay here we have three so who knows what will happen come the fall. So why are some people still so paranoid? And should they be?

  Now I'm not talking about the healthy paranoia. Those folks with lung issues and heart disease who are the highest of the highest at-risk get a pass to be as frightened and careful as is humanly possible. Cancer patients, immune-compromised folks are in that category too. Free passes all around. You know the people I mean. We all worry about them and do everything in our power to protect them from the virus. And we will continue to do so for many months to come.

  But there is a group of people who still have not left their homes. Those who are still relying on family and friends to get their groceries and medications. Who won't book a haircut or a doctor's appointment. Some won't even allow visitors on the patio or go grab a coffee from the drive-thru. Are they taking things too far? In my oh so humble opinion, they are.

  Taking baby steps back out into the world is necessary for all of us. If you live in an area where the numbers are low or almost nonexistent, as they are here in Ottawa and almost everywhere in Canada, it's time. And those of us enabling you to feed your fears, we need to stop too. The risk is minimal and as long as you wear a mask and wash your hands you will be fine.

  Don't take that last statement as cavalier. It wasn't meant that way. All any of us can do is just that. Wash our hands and wear a mask. But while most of us have gone back out into the world some of you are letting your fear keep you from participating. That is not healthy. In fact, that might be even worse than the virus for many of you. Letting fear take over parts of our lives can spread like wildfire and soon we cannot overcome any fear. That is no way to live...even in a pandemic.

  Every day in Canada our numbers are getting better. We've listened to what  Dr. Tam and provincial health experts have told us to do. Late winter and spring were spent without outside human contact. Zoom became our go-to word. But now it's time to leave our homes, create our bubbles, and start establishing our new normal. All of us.

  Don't let fear and paranoia control your life. Wash your hands. Wear your mask. Be smart and you will be safe.

  Ang

  

Out Of Focus

  It's been 19 days since the last time I posted on this blog. I would like to say it's because there hasn't been much newsworthy to write about in the past almost three weeks but we all know that would be a lie. In fact, there has been so much going on I honestly can't sit down to write about one before another one pops onto the radar that seems more important.

  So what topic do I pick? The murder of Rayshard Brooks? Jagmeet Singh being removed from the HOC for calling another MP a racist? The ongoing BLM marches in the United States and around the world that are in week three? Maybe yet another entry on COVID19 and the mind boggling death tolls? John Bolton's soon to be released tell-all about the Trump White House? 

  Or perhaps it's Jessica Mulroney showing us what white privilege looks like when your best friend is a person of color? How about NFL owners, coaches, and top players finally speaking up about racism? Maybe Canada not getting a seat on the UN Security Council? What about Loblaws removing the extra pay for their employees due to this ongoing pandemic? 

  Top contenders would be what school will look like in the fall or how to successfully open daycares. Have we learned anything about our consumerism during these three months of isolation? Can more people work from home to help cut down on congestion in major cities? Is "stuff" worth more than a hug?

  See my point? I can't narrow it down to one thing and stick to it. Trust me I've tried. Even as I was writing this earlier I had another "squirrel" moment. It's too easy to be distracted because I cannot keep up with the ever-changing landscape of this time in history. 

  One thing is for sure. 2020 is going to be studied in the years ahead as a time when the entire world came to a standstill, except New Zealand (they had their shit together from the very beginning), and so many of us realized that racism and police brutality was more important to fight than a pandemic. 

  How's that for something to focus on?

  Ang

George Floyd

  I can't breathe...

  Three small words heard around the globe. A plea from someone on the ground, in restraints. 

I can't breathe...

  Another black man, like too many before him, killed by the brutality of someone who enjoys inflicting pain and being in control. 

I can't breathe...

  A murderer hiding behind the shield and uniform of a police officer. Believing those things protect him from repercussions. Because that is what history has taught him.

I can't breathe...

  George Floyd's future taken away because of a suspected counterfeit bill. A child who no longer has their Dad. A mother who no longer has her son.

I can't breathe...

  For 8 minutes and 46 seconds, a knee was pressed down on George's throat. 2 minutes and 53 seconds of that time he was unresponsive. 

I can't breathe...

  Let George Floyd be the last. If his death can change a nation then his legacy would be one of hope. Not senseless violence.

I can't breathe...

  

Dear Donald Trump

  Dear Donald Trump,

  It seems to me, and the rest of the world, that you have missed the review of "How To Be A Leader During A Crisis" that the rest of the world leaders have taken. You may not have realized it would be necessary and thought oh I'll skip it. Well that was a mistake but not one you cannot overcome. Let me tell you how.

  Put on a mask! Citizens of a country rely on their leader to show them the proper way to handle a situation. Stop making fun of others who do. It's not a sign of weakness or herd-mentality. It is a sign of strength and caring for those who might be more susceptible than you. I'm sure you can find one or someone who will make one for you. It's not that hard. Tweet out your need. And while you are at it ask for a few extra for the rest of your unprotected staff.

  Show some compassion for those who have died. You are about to hit 100 thousand deaths and counting due to this virus and you have shown absolutely no concern for them or their families. I'm not saying cry at the podium but a "sorry for your loss" wouldn't go amiss.  If you can't do that small gesture then stop bragging about what a great job you think you have done. Give those families a little morsel at the very least. Think how your briefing ratings would go up!

  Stop contradicting the experts. We are all aware you are a stable genius but these folks are on the payroll so at least get your money's worth out of them. When they say bleach or hydroxychloroquine do not work just let them. We all know you are smarter so maybe just a wink or a roll of the eyes in the background is enough. 

  Now listen when it comes tweeting I know I know lots of followers, people waiting to hear from you blah blah blah, but is now really the time to be calling people names like sleepy, Pocahontas or lying? This is first-day stuff of that course you passed on. Take a break. Maybe don't take your phone to bed or the bathroom with you. Read a book instead. Or maybe the constitution? I've never read it, proudly Canadian, but I heard it's good.

  Look no one expects you to change overnight. That would be too much to ask. Especially of you. But maybe a baby step here or there wouldn't be too much to ask. Not that anyone is calling you a baby. Even though you've displayed more than one tantrum in the past week. I'm sure your constituents will forget about those. Unless of course those "fake news" agencies keep them in the headlines. They always try to make you look bad. Maybe you shouldn't give them so much ammunition.

  Honestly, there are only six short months till your job is over. We all know you didn't really want it in the first place. How about a vacation? Head to Florida and relax. Maybe get a checkup. Go hunting with Junior. Do whatever you used to do before the chaos began. Take golf lessons. 

  I'm sure VP Pence will keep your agenda going. He seems like a pretty loyal guy.

  Ang


  



  

What's A Little Dust Between Friends?

  When I think back to the plans I had during this time of self-isolation I cannot help but chuckle. I'm not sure where the organized cabinets are but they certainly are not here. Those closets that would only hold clothes I wore and loved? They have not materialized either. Freshly painted walls? Not here. So what happened to all those plans? Like most of us I set myself up to fail and that was the one thing I was successful at.

  I guess we didn't know how hard it would actually be. Not the cleaning and organizing but the focusing. When you have all the time in the world there is no incentive to get things done. So we did nothing. Or at least nothing extra. Except for Netflix...there were lots of extra binges. How could we focus on emptying drawers when the world was spiraling around us?

  Then it hit us. Just like that scene from How The Grinch Stole Christmas when the Grinch realized what Christmas was all about. Our clean, organized homes meant nothing when we couldn't hug our families or hang out with our friends. It is the people in our lives that we need to focus on. Their well-being. Their health, safety, and state of mind. That is what is truly important. We finally understood it and down Mt. Crumpet we went!

  Bottom line. There is dust in my house. On some furniture and a ceiling fan or two. The laundry isn't "caught up" and no closet has gotten the once over. But I'm proud of my home. It's where we've face-timed the grandparents and sang happy birthday to my Mom. The kids have sat in the recliners and talked to relatives and friends for hours on end. Sharing stories and laughs as best they can. Isn't that more important than a spotless house?

  We all handle this differently. My family tries to laugh as much as possible. Some days we are more successful than others. But when this is all over and we reemerge into the sunshine of life, not one of my friends or family will notice my dust or care if they do. And we certainly won't!

  Ang

  

Day 66

  Sixty-six days. 9.4 weeks. Two months and counting. That's a long time to be social distancing and basically never leaving your home. No parties. No movies. No family dinners. No school. No visiting. No doctor appointments. No sports. No...well I could just keep writing what we have been doing without but honestly that would be too depressing. We are all well aware of what we are missing out on. You don't need me to remind you.

  I think back to March 14. We had just arrived in Orlando and checked into our hotel. We had bought some groceries and were eating dinner with the news streaming in the background. That's when we heard Canada wanted everyone to start making their way home. This virus was now becoming a lot more serious than we thought and even though we had just arrived, it was time to go.

  We made it home in record time with no known contamination. Honestly we thought this would be short term. A few weeks. A month maybe. No longer though. Canada shut down? Couldn't happen. The entire world? Not a chance.  Yet here we are sixty-six days later with long greying hair just now starting to reopen. And we are all complaining it is too soon. Too fast. What made us all change our minds?

  Over 328 THOUSAND deaths world-wide are what did it. 6000 in Canada alone to date. People in hospitals for weeks on end hooked up to ventilators and fighting for every breath. Families unable to be with their loved ones in their final moments. We saw it on the news daily and it scared us. In our minds, we knew that the vast majority of us would make full recoveries. But our hearts told us to take no chances. So when we did have to go out, for essentials only, we wore a mask, avoided contact with everyone, and sanitized our hands till they were raw. And when we got home we washed everything and then sanitized our homes...just in case.

  So now, as we begin the slow process of reopening our great nation, it's important to remember all we have learned about what is important in life and what is not. Family and friends spending time together is the most important thing for almost every single person on the planet. All the other stuff is just filler. It's a valuable lesson and one we must not soon forget.

  On a final note...that hotel in Florida we left, Legacy Vacation Resort Orlando, very kindly gave us a credit for another 7-day stay at a future date. Even though they were in no way obligated to do so. Thanks!

  Ang

  

  

Buy Local...If You Can

  People have been talking almost nonstop about how the world is dependent on China and the goods they produce. Immediately followed with a "buy Canadian" or "buy local" rant. I've listened and while I agree, to a certain extent, I have a different slogan. Buy local...if you can.

  I love buying local produce from the small roadside market not far from my house. From mid-May till late November I buy almost all of my vegetables and as much fruit as I can from the locals. We head to farmers' markets on the weekend and buy cheese and the occasional cookie or pastry. The food tastes wonderful! But it comes at a steep cost.

  While I love the freshness and pesticide-free guarantee that comes with these foods I'm one of the lucky ones who can afford to pay the higher prices for it. The reality is that local means more expensive. A dozen eggs at the grocery costs $2.47 but the same sold locally is $5. Personally, I don't taste a difference and that is a big price difference to swallow. Multiply that by say forty items a week and that becomes a lot of money.

  Now before you say it yes farmers, beekeepers, bakers, etc need to earn a living. And yes they have a short period of time to make that. But perhaps a family of five cannot afford to buy ten locally made sausage at a cost of roughly $20 when Costco sells twenty-eight for $15. A fixed food budget doesn't allow for too many meals at that price. That's basic accounting. And that's just one item. 

  I had a conversation once with an artist who was insulted when someone tried to barter a lower price. It didn't end well and no sale was made. But it is hard sometimes to justify paying more for something just because it is locally made. Yes, we all agree local is better however we shouldn't belittle those who choose to go a different way. And when it comes to feeding our family we really shouldn't.

  This same conversation is taking place with organic food as well. Again if you want to and you can afford to...fill your boots. But not everyone can afford the extra cost. It doesn't mean they love their kids less, which I was told by a so-called friend of mine. It means we all have a certain amount of money and we all need to make personal decisions on the best way to spend it.

  Buy Canadian. Buy locally. Support your community. Do what your finances will allow. And don't make others feel less than because they make other choices. 

  Ang

  

Morning News

  This morning, like every other morning of the 57 days I've been social distancing/isolating, I checked the news online. And like every other day it didn't disappoint with its variety of topics. I decided to share a few that caught my eye just in case you didn't see them.

  Mitch McConnell said it was "classless" for Barack Obama to criticize the COVID-19 response of the Trump administration. He believes that the previous president shouldn't comment on the next one. Maybe he has a point. Afterall Bush Sr. didn't. Clinton didn't. Bush Jr didn't. But then again they did not constantly blame everything on their predecessor either like Trump does. Three and a half years later no matter what the issue it's the mess left from the Obama administration. How about this rule Mitch...they won't criticize your guy if he doesn't criticize the last one.

  Smog and air pollution have gone down significantly during this world-wide lockdown. Surely that isn't news to most of us? But the pictures! Wow. They show the devastation we are inflicting on this planet when placed side by side with today's pics. No one can ever look at the photos and then say there is no way to roll back some, or maybe even all, of the damage we have done. A picture may speak a thousand words but if you see the difference in Jakarta, Mumbai, or Milan air quality in just a few short months you will be speechless!

  Jerry Stiller has died of natural causes at the age of 92. He made old bones as the saying goes. He was hilarious in everything he did. I would say he probably is most famous for "Festivus for the rest of us" and "serenity now". Both classic lines from Seinfeld. Rest in peace Mr. Stiller and thank you for all the laughs over the years.

  An 18-year-old boy, yes boy, was charged when he was caught driving 308 km/h on a highway in Ontario. That's 191 miles per hour for those of you in the US...seriously why haven't you all moved to the metric system?? So there's more to this story that makes it even more shocking. He doesn't have his full license yet! And he had someone in the car with him! Sadly, though he is being criminally charged, he only loses his license for 7 days!! That's it. Do you think he will have learned his lesson?

  After only 274 years, Princeton University has its first black valedictorian! Not to brag but he is Canadian too. Personally, I cannot believe it's taken this long. Nicholas Johnson was taking financial engineering and is going on for his PhD in the fall. Congratulations Nicholas and keep breaking those barriers! You've made Canada very proud.

  That's just a few of the news articles catching my eye this morning. I left out the weird and absurd ones that always seem to make the headlines. You can find those yourself. Think of it as your own morning adventure!

  Ang

  

  

Mother's Day

  Like every other thing in our lives right now Mother's Day is different this year. No fancy brunches in restaurants with white table cloths and mimosas. Afternoon tea with tiny cucumber sandwiches and a view of the ocean is off. Dinner is takeout and no long walks afterward thru the tulips. But it's our day and we will take it in any form. Cause boy do we deserve it!

  This is the one day a year Moms are expected to put themselves first. We sleep late. Some get breakfast in bed...whether it is edible or not depends on the age of your children. Our kids are better behaved for the most part and someone orders our dinner or makes a reservation. Even the tv remote becomes ours alone. Name me one other day where that happens?

  Being a mom is, in the words of my friend Deb : "The hardest but most rewarding job on the planet."  Every stage of motherhood has its own challenges and rewards. It might not seem like it as we struggle thru tough times but there is. And speaking as the mom of two teenagers, enjoy whatever rewards you can see be they ever so small. 

  Growing up the "ideal" mother was Claire Huxtable. Smart kids who never talked back. Clean house. Never lost her temper. Stopped herself at one glass of wine. All the while knowing we were a lot more like Roseanne Connor. Smart-ass kids who struggled in school and who fought constantly with their siblings all while we yelled at them to stop. Yet we wanted to believe we could have the family life so enjoyed by this beloved tv character. Even though we know that life doesn't exist outside of television shows...and social media!

  Celebrate today however you can. It's not about the presents or the flowers or the food. It's about the little humans we have helped shape, or are helping to shape, into adults. It's taking one day out of the year and saying none of us are perfect but we are doing the best we can and we want absolutely nothing more than for you to know you are loved, you are special, you are wise. If you know that our job is done.

  Happy Mother's Day! 

  Ang

  

7 Weeks & Counting

  Like most of you, I have no interest in anything right now. I'm tired of watching Netflix and Prime. Tired of running the dishwasher three times a day and still waking up to dishes in the sink. The idea of going for yet another walk makes me tired and I have little or no interest in an evening drive to nowhere. I've cooked everything I know how to and more. I'm tired. Just plain tired. Aren't you?

  But like the vast majority of you, I will continue spending most of my day in these four walls and staying away from my friends and family. I'll don my mask to go into the grocery and will once again place an on-line order for renovation supplies. And sadly I will explain for the five hundredth time to my kids that I do not know if they will see their friends again this summer or whether we can travel to visit the grandparents. That conversation is the hardest.

  The highlight of my day will be watching the bluejays and cardinals come to the feeder and the bane in watching the squirrel devour their food. Our breakfast conversation will be about what we should eat for supper. I'll ask the kids what school work they have and ask them yet again to clean their rooms. 

  Days and weeks are now exactly the same. The news is depressing and should be avoided when children are around. Even adults should protect their mental health and steer clear as much as possible. But like the gluttons for punishment that we are, we watch it more than we should and kick ourselves for doing it. Tomorrow we will begin the cycle again.

  Life isn't all doom and gloom though. We still smile. Even laugh. But we are bored. And tired of the boredom. Of the monotony of this social distancing. Yet I am so thankful that my kids, family, and friends are all healthy, that I can get up every morning and see the light at the end of this very long tunnel. It's shining. Put your glasses on and you'll see it. Every day it is a little speck brighter.

  And if nothing else comes from this, most of us will learn there is such a thing as too much togetherness!

  Ang

  

  

Nova Scotia Strong

  One week ago 22 innocent people lost their lives in a small rural area of Nova Scotia. It left the entire country reeling and in mourning. Each person has a story and I would not attempt to tell even one of them. But I want to talk about the community and the sadness we all have to overcome.

  Grief is a very personal and often private thing. There is no right or wrong way to do it. So don't tell them how to. They might not need to listen to testimonials or virtual concerts. They don't have to flood Facebook about the victims or join groups dedicated to hearing messages of condolences. Signs in windows and tartans are not necessary for some. It doesn't mean they aren't hurting. It just means they choose to experience it all in a different way. And you don't get to judge them for it.

  Like any tragedy, we need to process our feelings in order to move on. That takes on many forms. But the majority of people want to share theirs with family and friends. To have someone help carry even a small part of the load for a few brief moments. Somehow knowing someone is feeling your loss too helps us. If only fleetingly. But in this time of social distancing, we are denied even that small comfort. Instead, we are left on our own with no physical contact to help us heal. It is a double whammy for many.

  For some people, like myself, we get little or no comfort from strangers. Though the words are kind and the sentiments are genuine, it seems almost... intrusive. To me anyway. But online vigils and funerals are bringing comfort to many across the country. And while I cannot say for sure I would assume they are bringing some to the families of the victims.

  No matter how you grieve it takes time. More than we can comprehend for some. Whether you accept things and move on quickly or need extended time, it's on nobody's timetable but your own. Do not let people tell you how to do it. But the only caveat to that statement is if you are relying on alcohol or drugs to get thru the days. That isn't going to help you in the long term.

  One last thing...Nova Scotia is made up of people who have a unique ability to be there for each other. Even when they can't actually be there. That's where the hashtag Nova Scotia Strong came from. You are never alone in your grief. Remember that. 

  Ang

Nova Scotia Strong

  Unlike any other place in Canada, Nova Scotia gives me a sense of security. A feeling that I am safe and no harm will come to me. Yesterday that image was shattered. Not just for me but for the majority of its citizens. For some unknown reason, a man decided to take the lives of sixteen innocent people. 

  We may never know why. Police will investigate every possibility in the months to come. Whatever they find out will bring little or no comfort to the families but perhaps will give some sense of closure. I sincerely hope so.

  Life is fleeting. These tragedies show us just how much so. If there is anything to be learned from this it should be that. Hug your children. Call your family. Love them even from a distance.

  One of the victims of this tragedy was a police officer. She made a decision 23 years ago to become one of those rare heroes who are willing to sacrifice their own lives to protect the rest of us. Constable Heidi Stevenson we thank you for your sacrifice. There are no words to express how much we honor you and your memory. 

  Ang 

I Wish

  Can you imagine what life will be like when this pandemic is all over? I hope it doesn't go back to "normal" because that wasn't working for a lot of people. I've got my fingers crossed that we will shift to a new idea of normal and that the entire country remembers who kept us going through these unprecedented weeks and months.

  I hope people, including the government, will remember that they gave workers $2000 a month to survive. Many workers don't make that much working full time. Where did this dollar figure come from? If that is the minimum needed to get by in a month don't we owe it to those who are surviving on less to top them up to at least this amount? Those on social services and disability should get that too right? Grocery store clerks and personal care workers in nursing homes deserve that much too, wouldn't they? Seniors with only OAS and the Supplement don't come close to that number. What about them? See what I mean about normal not being that great?

  Doctors need help. We as a country need to recruit them in new and inventive ways. You want to go to university and become a doctor? Well sign this little contract a la Northern Exposure and your student loans are gone. Give us 10 or 15 years of treating locals and we will give you a house to live in and a car to drive. Hell we will throw in a yearly vacation if that's what it takes. But we need more doctors...right now.

  Never again can we rely on other countries when it comes to our healthcare supplies. We should all be proud of how so many Canadian companies stepped up and changed their manufacturing to gowns, masks, and shields. Most without being asked to do so. Maybe every so often they need to do this and replenish our stockpiles so we never get caught with our pants down again. At the mercy of other countries who are going through the exact same shortages as we are. No nurse in an ER cares that the face shield protecting her says Bauer across the top. Let's look at being self-sufficient in this one important area. 

  Let's stop calling some workers "unskilled" and agree that they deserve respect and a living wage. We need to stop looking down our noses at those who are front line workers without any of the benefits the name usually brings. We've all realized how totally screwed we would be without grocery clerks, delivery drivers, garbage collectors, etc. They are doing a job that gets no respect but keeps us all going. 

  One thing we've all seen first hand is how we are too busy most of the time. Yes our kids are nightmares most of the time, but when we all play a board game or have pizza on the floor before watching a movie, you can see they are making memories. Many of us are calling elderly parents and relatives daily to make sure they are okay. The conversation naturally changes to "Do you remember when..." or "Whatever happened to..." and we take a trip down memory lane. We have time for the people we cherish and miss. That would be a fantastic thing to have as "normal".

  I wish many changes after all this is said and done. That we finally understand what is important in life and stop wasting our valuable time on those that don't.  We owe it to the 147,512 people worldwide who have died so far and sadly to those yet to come.

  Stay safe. Stay home.

  Ang

A Living Wage

  Not much in life leaves me speechless. I'm a little jaded after a life seeing what humans are capable of doing to each other. Yet yesterday I heard in plain and simple words something that stopped me in my tracks. 

  "Some people are not meant to have a living wage". Read that again. "Some people are not meant to have a living wage". My first question to that is of course who gets to decide who those people are? Do I get a say? What're the criteria? Who makes that criteria? And most importantly who the hell would say that????

  I have heard various versions of that statement over the years. Coded but there. Usually, it is hidden in remarks about education or abilities. Those little comments we've all heard. People wanting to say it but knowing what kind of reaction they will receive if they do. So they hide it. Phrase it differently. The underlying truth is still there. They know it and you do too.

  Once someone I know was told, and I'm paraphrasing here, "Imagine what your life could have been like had you gone to university". For the record, the speaker knew the kind of life my friend had led. Filled with charity work, helping others, kindness, standing up for the underprivileged and too many other things for me to list. Yet the fact that they didn't have a degree or an important career, in their eyes, was a life wasted. 

  Years ago I worked with a lady named Joyce. She had worked her entire adult life serving food in a bar. She got a raise only when the minimum wage increased every few years. Unlike many people who go off to high paying jobs every morning, "real" careers, Joyce was happy. She loved her job. And the regulars loved her. They didn't care if she was slow or got their order wrong. She always had a smile and remembered names, birthdays and kids. When someone died, got married or had a baby she was included. She was a small ray of sunshine to those who came into the bar. Not a bad way to spend your life is it?

  I was informed I was wrong when I said lots of people who work at a gas station or a fast-food restaurant or a grocery store are the main earners in many families. No way could that be the way they pay their rent I was told. No that's how they pay their mortgage and put braces on their kids' teeth and food on the table was my reply. Do people honestly believe only high-income earners have anything? Seriously? I know lots of families who survive and thrive, on less than the average. It's done all the time.

  Like almost every crisis we have lived through, the healthcare providers shine. They are always there when we need them and en masse, we herald their unselfish and unwavering dedication to our health. Even at the risk of their own. But this time it truly is those who "don't deserve to make a living wage" that are stealing the spotlight. Just a few short months ago people were complaining about the minimum wage hike and how it would ruin the economy and raise prices. More than one of you said that an entire group of workers doesn't deserve more money in their paycheque. Do you feel bad now? You should.

  How many of us have waited in line to get into a grocery only to see the cashier standing behind plexiglass exhausted? Going to work every day so we can bear our distancing with a full stomach and snacks on hand. Yet six months ago we looked down upon them and wondered why they weren't in real professions. 

  Take some of this downtime to reflect on your bigotries. Reevaluate how you measure a person's worth. Or even if you have the right to do so. Look at who is keeping this country going and treat them with the dignity and respect you should have always been showing. 

  To the woman who said some people don't deserve a living wage...you are a disgrace to the human race. Knowing nothing about you I judge you as lacking in empathy, compassion, and kindness. Doesn't feel great, does it?

  Ang

Happy Easter...From A Distance

  One thing about being a military family, you get used to spending holidays away from your extended family. I can count on one hand the amount of Christmas, Easter and Thanksgiving dinners we have spent with blood relations. Our table was normally filled with friends or a few times just the two of us. We survived and during this bizarre time of COVID-19 and distancing so will you!

  First off, most of it is your mindset. If you always go to the "my family is not here"  guess what? You will be miserable. There is this new thing called a telephone or even newer the internet where you can actually speak and see your extended brood. Get one of your kids or grandkids to open a Zoom account and you can add all the family. Who says you have to be in the same room to have dinner together? Bonus... fewer dishes to wash.

  If at all possible get outside. Call your neighbor and sit on your steps and chat across the driveway. Wave to the folks walking by. Chances are they will stop and chat for a few minutes. Or you be the walker and stopper. If someone is raking the leaves or playing with their kids ask how they are or how school is going. Who knows you might make some new friends in your community.

  Make dinner. Maybe not a 20lb turkey or a too big for the roaster ham but smaller versions. Try to recreate Grandmas butterscotch pie. You will have a funny story to tell when you speak to her. Or that "special" punch that seems to disappear quickly. One item that brings a smile to your face. Even for a short period of time.

  Look it's not ideal.  We can all agree on that. But since we are in unprecedented times we make the best of it. Figure out some way to get thru it and if you need some help here's something to think about...staying home today might mean your loved ones are around for the next holiday meal. Or even you.

  Stay home. Stay healthy. Happy Easter!

  Ang
  

Social Distancing Lessons

  I'm always complaining to myself that I don't have enough time to write. Now I have nothing but time and I'm still not. What's up with that? Tonight I thought I would share a few things I've learned in the 14 days of self-isolation and the 9 days that have followed it.

  My kids cannot, under any circumstance, use the same glass twice. Not even for water. Here's what happens...take clean glass from cupboard, fill glass with water, drink one-fourth of it, put glass on just cleaned off counter, leave room, return three minutes later, take clean glass from cupboard, fill glass...are you seeing the pattern? Now imagine this is repeated 8-10 times per day. Times two! It's no wonder the dishwasher runs almost nonstop.

  Another startling discovery we've made is that our kids only want to talk to us when we are trying to watch something important. Want to know what time the daily PM update is on? We don't need a watch we'll know cause that's when we hear the pitter-patter of big feet coming down the stairs ready to engage in conversation. It never fails and we mute or pause the tv to actually engage in the conversation. We feel blessed that our kids want to speak with us so we pretend we don't need to know the latest updates. But at 11:15 every single day?  Seems a little fishy to me.

  We basically wear three outfits. I've seen several combinations of clothes for three weeks now. But it's always one of three tops with jeans or sweats. So why do we have full closets? If we aren't going to wear them why have them? Maybe minimalism is best. Worth a shot anyway. I wonder if anyone would notice.

  Probably the biggest life lesson we've learned, and the most important by far, is that we can handle anything. We drive each other nuts. Some days we laugh a lot and other days we switch to yelling. But we show up every single day ready to protect each other and make sure we are all okay. Even when we don't know what okay really is. We are small in number but we are strong, resilient and capable of accomplishing anything we put our minds to.

  That's a few of our lessons. I hope you have learned some while spending way too much time with your loved ones. Feel free to share. 

  Ang

  

  

Stay Home

  Stay home. Two small words. No hidden meaning. Just stay home. So why in the hell are people not understanding it? Is it really too much for people to comprehend?

  Ok, ok, sometimes we are given instructions that are hard to follow. Have you made anything from IKEA? Yeah it isn't always plain and simple. But these are. Do not leave your house. Don't visit your grandma. No playdates. Dinner parties are canceled. Stay home.

  Absolutely go to the pharmacy to get your medication. Maybe call them first and see if they deliver. They might not have before but desperate times mean desperate measures. Any other time of the year you'd be happy not to have to go out and get them. Enjoy it now if it's available. Bonus...it's probably free!

  Food is the biggie. We all worry about it, especially now. But just like the pharmacy, there are many ways to get supplies and never leave your couch. Neighbors, delivery services, online ordering with contact-free curbside delivery.  All viable options. But if you believe only you can buy your groceries go early in the morning or late in the evening. Bring some Lysol wipes. Get only what you need and stay 6 feet away from other shoppers. Speed counts. And very importantly...be nice to the workers. Say thank you. Ask if they are well. Be patient and polite. Without them, we would all be in big trouble.

  We all need to stop this virus. Every single one of us has a part to play. And for the vast majority of us, it is just to stay home. Remember one month ago we were making every excuse in the book to do just that!

  Ang


  

Isolation Week 2...School Begins

  Week two began exactly like week one ended...with a whimper. Yup nothing new. Nothing exciting. Happily, we are all still symptom-free! Daily life has taken on a new sort of normal and we are settled into a routine of sorts. 

  The boys are "back to school". This translates to they spend a few minutes reading, speaking french and doing some math each day. Their teachers have been great. Sending emails and using Facetime and Skype to check on them. Trying to keep them engaged. Are they successful? More than you would think! Boredom is a very motivating tool for teenagers apparently.

  Food is the biggest obsession for us. It's strange to live within a 5-minute drive of no less than six groceries and not be able to get food. If I'm honest it's caused me a bit of anxiety. I placed an order six days ago and it is another eight days before pick up! Eight days! In three days we are able to go into the store again so we are not going to starve to death while we wait. But there is something disturbing about fearing you cannot feed your children. Even if it's not the truth. I cannot imagine the real fear that many live with daily.

  The birds are a big source of enjoyment. We don't have any birdseed ( see previous entries/rants about the squirrel invasion) til Tuesday. Then the buffet line will begin again. I was never much of a bird watcher but it's calming so I think I'll continue with it. IF we can figure out a way to keep those damn squirrels at bay.

  Hopefully, your life is as boring as mine is. Right now that is exactly what the entire world needs to be doing. Sitting at home. Watching too much tv. Spending too much time on social media. Having too many snacks. 

  Stay home. Wash your hands. Watch the birds.

  Ang

  

  

Self Isolation - Week 1

  I've been putting off writing about our self-imposed isolation. One because well nothing is going on as you can imagine. Two I find it hard to not dwell on the ridiculousness of too many people during a time of worldwide crisis. I may have to edit this repeatedly but here goes.

  Doug Ford has shocked the pants off of me. In a good way. Yup, you read that right. I've never been a supporter of his. Quite the opposite. And I still do not agree with the direction he has been taking this province. Yet I find myself nodding my head as he speaks about what they are doing and how they are going about it. I appreciate that he is letting the "experts" speak. It shows confidence I didn't realize he had. I had referred to him as a "good ole boy" in the past and as of this moment that has turned out to be a good thing. We all know that those type of people take care of the most vulnerable first and fight to the death in that effort. I may never compliment him again but for now, he's doing a good job. I might even go so far as to say great. Maybe.

  In only a few short days I've realized how much money we spend...on nothing. Foolish things. Not even just unnecessary items but the stuff we talk ourselves into believing we need. Did you find that too? I've ordered groceries online. Even that bill is lower than normal. Simply because the extras are not in the cart. Those things that sit in the pantry cupboard or at the bottom of the freezer for months, or even years, on end. It's amazing how much money we have when they stay on the shelf.

  Another thing I have become aware of is the number of times per day I touch my face and hair. Don't even get me started on my glasses. I'm not sure I can count that high. Even now that I hear "don't touch your face" a thousand times on the tv, I'm still doing it. I'm almost willing to believe that the more they tell me the more I do it. While typing these last two sentences I've scratched my ear, adjusted my glasses and rubbed my nose. Omg I touched the glasses again!

  With 24/7 coronavirus news, there is one thing I am 100% sure of....I'm forever grateful I was born in Canada and not the United States. Imagine, actually I can't, trying to face this pandemic without health insurance! Imagine the fear. I can't even. It's insanity down there most of the time when it comes to paying for a doctor visit but to be in the middle of this pandemic and have to worry about getting treatment? It's unfathomable.

  And then there is Trump. If anyone ever had any doubt of his arrogance and incompetence now you have your proof. In the middle of a world-wide pandemic he lies. Daily. About very important things. Lies that will kill people. The amount of damage he has done is immeasurable. 

  Finally, the hardest thing to do is stay away from people. Social distancing isn't normally hard for me. In fact I probably enjoy it a little too much. But now that I have to do it...I find I want to be more social. In theory. I'm sure it's just a phase. Just like my kids wanting to go back to school is.

  Look we all dislike what is going on in the world. It's uncharted territory. But we need to behave like we are all infected right now and don't want to give it to anyone else. I read something the other day that puts it all in perspective. Anne Frank and her family spent 20 months hiding in an attic. Never going outside. Not making a sound. We've spent what...six days? And we have internet!

  We need to get over ourselves. And wash our hands. Damn I touched my mouth again!!

  Ang

  

  

  

Goodbye....For Now Mayor Pete

  If you follow US politics, and honestly with the chaos that goes on daily down there how can you not, you know last night Pete Buttigieg stopped his campaign. This should make everyone sad. They finally had a chance to have a qualified person run the country. And they blew it.

  He is smart. Super smart. Oxford and Harvard are his alma maters. He can intake information, analyze it, understand it, ask informed questions then come up with a course of action. Wouldn't that be amazing in a leader? Pete speaks, at least conversationally, eight languages. Eight! Most of us struggle with our native tongue let alone going out and learning Dari and Arabic.

  Speaking of Dari, he put it to good use while serving in Afghanistan. So he's smart and a veteran. The idea of using military force in a region would have different meanings for him than others. Can you imagine the difference in conversations regarding whether military action is needed? Pete's would have more weight as he knows the human side of such decisions. It's a loss for all military members.

  But I would say the biggest loss for the country is his calmness. It was such a stark difference from what the people of the US have become accustomed to. That level-headedness comes from confidence, experience and the ability to accept help when needed. All true characteristics of a born leader in my opinion. None of which they are enjoying at the moment.

  I feel sorry for the people of the United States. They have missed out on what could have been one of the greatest presidencies in their history. Wait a second...Pete is 37. Based on the ages of those left he can run what nine more times? Maybe next time they will have come to their senses. I hope.

  Ang

News Flash

  Jane Fonda says no more plastic surgery for her. The 82-year-old is heralded for her bravery. Demi Lovato posts a picture of herself makeup-free. What a bold thing to do at 27! Supermodel Ashley Graham embraces her post-baby stretch marks. An inspiration to us all! Wait what???? Does anyone actually believe these are actions that are worthy to be praised and honored? No wonder women are messed up.

  The so-called news is filled with these types of stories. We inhale them. Who knows why. Are there are so many scary things going on in the world that we want to block it out with "fluff" stories? Wouldn't we be better off educated on what is going on in the real world? Obviously not.

  I get it. The news can both scare and depress us. Between coronavirus, politics, and unemployment rates there are enough real problems to keep us occupied. Wrinkles and stretch marks might be someone's idea of news but they need a reality check in my humble opinion. Real issues, real problems that need to be looked into and discussed need to be the headlines not this.

  All that being said...wrinkles and makeup-free pics might be important to Jane and Demi. That's ok because it is about them. You and I shouldn't care one iota about it. And if we feel the need to herald them over something let's try Ms. Fonda protesting for climate change every week or Ms. Lovato for helping others who are battling addiction as she is. Those are real things we could/should get behind. 

  Here's a news flash for everyone...I will not be getting any plastic surgery and almost every photo I post of myself on social media will be makeup-free. I know, I know I'm very brave. An inspiration. No autographs please :)

  Ang


  

Just A Little Crazy

  The sun is shining. The air is warm...ish. The new feeder is filled with seeds and nuts for all those birds adventurous enough to move around today. And a squirrel. One big, fat squirrel with a tail longer than a toddler's arm. Who at this moment looks like he wants to come through the patio door and attack me. And I'm not gonna lie he's annoying me.

  I'm not a bird watcher per se. But it's Sunday morning and I'm relaxing with the first coffee of the day and it's nice to see the red cardinals. They give me hope that winter cannot last forever. Little chickadees come behind them and eat the leftovers. Off in the distance, watching closely is that rodent. Waiting and plotting.

  This winter has seemed longer and colder than most in my recent memory. We are almost to the end of the historical "worst" month but that doesn't make me feel good about the month to come. I'm tired of snow and ice and of being cold.

  He's back. Sneaking along the snowbank. Climbing up the back of the trellis. Trying to blend in. Out of the corner of my eye, I see the feeder sway. Is it the wind? Is it him? Do I hunt for the water gun to shoo him away? Why aren't those birds scaring him away? What is wrong with them???

  I just took a moment to read what I wrote. I sound a little....crazy. This proves more than anything else that I need a vacation. A long one.

  Ang

   

A Good Day For A Parent

  If you are the parent of a teenager you know they don't show much enthusiasm. By that I mean no matter what is going on in their mind their outer reaction is very blah. Very "whatever". Everything is ok not great just ok. So when you get a reaction, good or bad, you take notice and revel in it.

  Two days ago my oldest, who is at a political forum for youth, had one of those reactions. And boy did we sit up and take notice. I knew when he called something had happened. Something big. There was no pretense of calm. He was bouncing. He had won the lottery in his mind. What could possibly turn our teenager into an exuberant nonstop talker? He was going to speak in the House of Commons!

  Okay to you and I maybe that's not a bucket list item. To my son....it was more than he could have dreamt possible. He was picking topics to speak about. Editing and reworking. Then fixing it some more. It must be perfect. Or better than perfect. This was important to him. As it should be.

  Yesterday he did it. He spoke in front of the people who make the laws and rules of our country. He gave his opinion on a subject dear to him and to many of us. A dream had come true for him. When he called to tell us how it went he was back to being his normal teenage self. It went "good". He was "ok" with it. Now he was going to hang out with his new friends. Approximately two minutes on the phone and he was off. An average teenager again.

  Enjoy the parenting moments when you can. Remember underneath that surly, sassy, sulky facade is the same engaged, inquisitive and awesome kid you haven't seen in a few years. They are still there. They just don't want you to know it. 

  Ang

  


  

Dear HGTV,

  Dear HGTV,

   You need to look at whoever is editing your House Hunters International shows.....and fire them. Almost every single person comes across as, I hate to say it, not very bright and very unrealistic. I find I spend most of the episode shaking my head in disbelief.

  These people have an opportunity to expand their horizons and experience new areas and cultures. Instead, they are comparing every single living space to what they had. As if they did no research or even a basic google search to know that living space in Europe is significantly smaller than in North America. It's strange to watch.

  Just this morning I watched a couple dismiss a place because it didn't have the same size refrigerator as they had in the United States. A man talked about the lack of a handle on the sliding bathroom door as if the world was about to collapse. The lack of a "spare" bedroom always comes up as a fault. Where are they ever going to put all the guests who will be coming to visit?? FYI no one is ever coming to visit you.

  The concept of the show is very appealing. A chance to see what housing is like in different areas of the world and how much it costs. Instead, we see whiny, entitled people who are an embarrassment to their country. Most of them should never leave as they are certainly not going to be open to the new experiences available in a foreign country.

  Not all of the clients are bad. Far from it but if you could take out the strange, almost idiotic comments they all seem to make perhaps the show would have a more positive outlook. For everyone involved.

  Just my opinion.....Ang

1.2 Million

  There are 117 elementary schools here in Ottawa. Most, if not all, could benefit from a breakfast program. Not a full sit down one but a piece of fruit, a muffin, and a milk or orange juice. Let's take oh I don't know....1.2 million dollars. Divide it equally amongst the schools and then by the ten months of school. That's $10,256.41 for each school or $1,025 each month. That is one hell of a lot of muffins and fruit!

  In the nation's capital, there are approximately 26 food banks and distribution centers. Using those same 1.2 million dollars, imagine an extra $46K per year for each one of them. Can you imagine how many families that could help? How many kids wouldn't go to bed hungry with those extra funds? That would be wonderful, wouldn't it?

  Nova Scotia is 55,000 square km with only two Veteran's Affairs offices. Some veterans, who are in their 90's, are 300 km away from an office. Going back to our dollar amount of 1.2 million, lets set up four part-time offices in various places to cut down the travel time for our heroes. Better yet let's hire ten people who go to the veteran's homes to see how we can help them. Between salary and expenses, each person would have a budget of $120K. 

  An autism center, an addiction counseling service, a nursing home, volunteer fire brigade, pick any underfunded organization, and there are too many to mention, and offer them 1.2 million in added funding and watch them go. Even as a one-shot deal they will make major improvements in people's lives. Guaranteed!

  By now you might be wondering what does any of this mean? Where is she going with this? The 1.2 million I keep referring to....well that is the projected cost the government might have to pay to protect Harry & Meghan if they move to Canada. Per year! As you can see it's not much money in the big federal government budget but it can make a huge difference in the lives of average Canadians when used properly. It is OUR tax dollars after all.

  I want this seemingly lovely couple to live in a country where they can thrive. I want then to be happy, healthy and productive. I want them to have the freedom to raise their family in private. Just not on my dime. 

  Ang

  

Separation...Harry Style

  You don't need to be a genius to know that when Prince Harry got married he and his wife would be paparazzi gold. Throw in the fact that Meghan Markle is an actress, not to mention from the US....they still remember the uproar over  Wallis Simpson...and anyone would assume that life outside the palace walls would be chaotic for them. Now we are hearing they weren't prepared for all of it. Then they are both naive and not very smart.

  Come on, Harry has spent his entire life in the spotlight. Every girlfriend he has ever had has gone through the same scrutiny as his wife has. Not to the same extent but enough to make him aware that an engagement ring would amp up the coverage. And that a wedding, not to mention a baby, would start a feeding frenzy that might never end. Surely history showed him that.

  He has been very vocal that he believes the paparazzi killed his mother. That he hates the flashing of cameras because he knows photographers took photos of Princess Diana when she was lying in the car dying instead of trying to help keep her alive. That is an almost impossible situation when you have been in the public eye your entire life. 

  So why exit now? And is it really all Meghan's fault? Maybe it is. Maybe she was able to give him the strength and courage to walk away. To put his own happiness and mental health above his "job" and family commitments. Isn't that what a supportive spouse would do? Maybe he finally opened his eyes and thought he didn't want his child to lead the public life he has had. We will never know exactly why now but there are a lot of common sense reasons why he should.

  However...every penny he has ever had has been at the taxpayer's expense. The inheritance from his mother, the money he gets from his father's trust, the "salary" the Queen gives him annually all came from British citizens. The security for his family, hotels, private planes, African resorts, Canadian estates....all paid by the government. Even the posh wedding was on the public dime. The only money that is rightfully his own is the salary he received while he was in the British army. So this talk about being financially independent is an oxymoron. She has some earned resources but honestly not enough to keep this lifestyle going long term. Check the price of a first-class ticket and then imagine what a private plane would cost.

  All of this brings me to the gossip that they are thinking about moving to Canada. My first question is who pays the security bill? I've read a few articles that seem to think the government of Canada would have to since we are part of the Commonwealth. Do they get special privileges? Invites to official functions? Stay at the Governor Generals residence?  Police escorts? We need every penny we can get to improve our education and healthcare systems. We sure as hell are not in any position to pay for their privacy.

  No matter where they go or what they do they will face a lifetime of scrutiny. But it's hard for me to feel sorry for two people who have every privilege known to man and could have drifted off into obscurity with little or no fuss had they kept their plans a family affair instead of telling the world. The only one I feel sorry for is the baby. He was born into this circus and has no say what-so-ever.

  Ang